Matthew 4:1-11
These you can read in the Bible.
I battled with the throbbing pain in my head all sermon. Tough day... AND I HAD JUST WOKE UP NOT EVEN TWO HOURS PRIOR!!! It was hard to walk by the end of the sermon. The pain was enough. Tired wasn't even the word... that I was feeling. I came right home...
I sat around for awhile watching NFL Network (like I do DAILY) and it took a few hours to feel better. As I sat, I thought about all the other people who couldn't go out and enjoy the day outside because of epilepsy, migraines, or whatever illnesses ail them. Then I thought about next season...Leominster Razorbacks. I absolutely had to go. No choice. Well, actually there IS a choice... not go and give up for the day, or try to make it and fight it... to walk, then jog, then run. Every journey starts with a single step... I went to the gym... at 1700.
As I said last night, the gym closes at 1900. I walked in and it was very quiet there. Not too many people there. I walked on the treadmill for about twenty minutes. It was hard to do. VERY hard. My legs were on fire. UGH... My head was light... I had my Zune on and I was listening to some music. Had a little pick me up music on... and I kept on trucking. It was disheartening to see people two times my age running so fast on the treadmills and ellipticals and here I was... a semi-pro football player who was a 2010 defensive co-captain, a Pop Warner football coach, a basketball coach... walking. Limited. Measurable mobility. Just a few months ago, I could run no problem. Now, my mind says 'GO! GO!! GO!!!' My body says 'Ummm, NOPE!'. It's so hard to understand... but the answers are not for me to understand. When I started lifting on the Technogym machines (Lat Pulldowns, Chest Press) I was only working with 110 pounds and I'm used to 200 to 250! With the curl I was struggling to lift 30 pounds. My pride was so far broken I couldn't and still can't describe it. I asked myself..."Is His grace still sufficient?". I'll tell you the same thing I told myself... "_______" Nothing. Silence. This is that wall. There were teenagers there who were lifting more than me... I couldn't do it. His grace brings me here... right now. Can I as a Christian accept that? It is hard to say. The fact I can say that doesn't make me less of a Christian or a 'backsliding' Christian... it just makes me a man. An accountable Christian man.
Romans 7:21-25 (The Message)
It happens so regularly that it's predictable. The moment I decide to do good, sin is there to trip me up. I truly delight in God's commands, but it's pretty obvious that not all of me joins in that delight. Parts of me covertly rebel, and just when I least expect it, they take charge.
24I've tried everything and nothing helps. I'm at the end of my rope. Is there no one who can do anything for me? Isn't that the real question?
25The answer, thank God, is that Jesus Christ can and does. He acted to set things right in this life of contradictions where I want to serve God with all my heart and mind, but am pulled by the influence of sin to do something totally different.
Imagine if you can for a second, playing with your kids, loved ones, or just walking down the street to the store on Monday. By Tuesday, and everyday after that... you don't know if you have the energy to go room to room in your own home. Could you not get angry? Just a little? That's okay too. I did. In fact, I still am. I ask again? Is His grace sufficient? At times, I can't answer... today, I can't as of right now. I'm praying for God to speak to me. Whisper words of comfort to this body of 31 years that feels so old. I'm trying to make it and I know I can't do it alone.
It surprises me how there are so many people who can believe in luck, chance, and superstition (all of which you cannot prove scientifically either), but laugh at the sheer thought of Jesus Christ. If they can give all of these things a chance, why not give Jesus a try? What else is there possibly to lose? I mean really. I am by no means a Jesus Freak or a Bible Thumper but I only like to generate discussion. I say if you are offended by the very mention of God, then stop spending American money (it ALL says 'In God We Trust') and you obviously don't agree with that, don't sing the national anthem (last stanza proclaims 'In God Is Our Trust') and obviously you don't, the very laws that protect you shouldn't (In American courts, you swear an oath on the Bible) don't matter much if you don't believe in the middle of it)... I won't even discuss why Colombus came over here anyways nor will I bring up why the British were so ticked off at us branching off... yes, religion had a part in all of it. Oh well... moving on. Let me step off of my soap box.
The Patriots are playing the Steelers so I'm done for now... Oh, here's a few of my favorite websites.
- New England Patriots
- 98.5 The Sports Hub
- Pandora (great app) free on Blackberry or on desktop
- Bible Gateway
Sometimes, if the mood strikes me... I may type multiple times in a day. As always, feel free to ask questions...
Love And Light,
Danny
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