This is the hardest thing I have come across. Hands down.
I have come to learn so much in the past few days... Well, weeks actually. I see that my brothers on two different football teams, Twin City Blue Raiders and Gardner Sabercats are enjoying winning records, and I am on the sidelines as a coach of a Pop Warner team. I'd love to play semi-pro again, but I question if I can play.
On one hand, there is a coach who says they have seen me play and he knows I have heart and I am an animal on the field. On another hand, some of the guys I used to play with remember what I was to the Leominster Razorbacks. I'm a valued player... even now.
Let's be clear, I haven't strapped up since last October... but the memories of those I talked to know that I am all about the science of the game. I break it down and analyze it each down of the game. Everyone knows that.
Stepping on the field is my dream. Chasing that ring... the ring I've dreamed about for years. In 2005, I walked away from football for my job with Verizon Wireless and that same year they won the NEFL crown. I've regretted it ever since. I need that ring. I need to win that ring. By any means necessary.
What will I do? My phone is starting to blow up, people ask me at the field why 'I'm not on the field as a player' even asking about next year!
Sideline vs. Gridiron.... can I do both again? After what I know now... I honestly don't know. Coaching is fun, but playing is personal. How can I go from captain of a semi-pro team to being offered equipment manager? Can't do it. But to be respected enough to be asked for by name is a humbling experience. As in a player and coach for a semi-pro team.
Where to go? What to do? Like the title of one of my fave Kevin Costner films For The Love Of The Game. That's why. Gotta clear my head.
By any means necessary.
As I sit here and watch NFL Network I ask myself, can I do it? Can I be what I always wanted to be? Damn right. I'm mentally tough and can hit hard still.... at the young age of 32.
It's time to decide... sideline vs gridiron.
What to do...??
In time... it will come. I pray God gives me the strength to make the right one.
About Me
- RevDuck99
- I am a God-fearing journeyman who is looking to educate others on life, God, and their salvation. I have a migraine disorder. I truly believe that there is NO migraine medication that can cure my migraines. Some say that I'm a positive person, some say I'm negative. I say I'm just a realist. Moses was too. Paul (in the Bible) kept it straight. He never pulled any punches and he knew what was real and how hard things were. I try to be that way for those who have this horrible disease epilepsy that cannot function some days and don't want to live others... for reasons unknown to me sometimes too... but God's will is all that I strive to find wisdom in...
